"Daddy, can I play football?"

I played organized football for 13 years of my life. I started playing when I was ten, and played five years of Pop Warner football before high school. I played four more years in high school, then based my decision on where to attend college based, in part, on which schools recruited me to play. I then played four years of college football. Mind you, I was not a highly recruited player coming out of high school, 5' 9" quarterbacks rarely are (unless they are as talented as, say, Doug Flutie or Russel Wilson). But I had a handful of the Ivies and Small Ivies come my way, and settled on playing at my alma mater, Wesleyan University in Middletown, Connecticut.

I started one game in college. We won, no thanks to me. When we scored the go-ahead touchdown late in the fourth quarter, I had been pulled from the game, and our starting quarterback, playing with a severely sprained ankle, had returned to action and gamely led us to victory playing basically on one leg.

Playing football throughout my formative years provided me with friendships, life lessons, and memories that I will carry with me the rest of my life. It helped forge my identity, it opened doors for me, it provided me with a sense of discipline, structure, and teamwork. But as I sit here now, at the age of 36 and with a young 18 month old son, for a variety of reasons I wonder, no, I fear, the day he asks me if he can play the game his father once played, still loves, and misses playing to this day.

The first thing I feel every morning I wake up is pain. (Before I continue, please do not interpret this as some "woe is me" drivel. The pain I feel is nothing in comparison to the pain felt by those fighting life-threatening diseases, or those who have been injured in severe accidents, or at war, etc.) The pain I first notice is my back, from my neck down into my right arm, which is numb or tingling most of the time, down my spine into my legs. Pain due to numerous herniated discs and bulging discs, pain caused by blind side hits, head on collisions, and other violent impacts incurred in 13 years of playing this sport.

The next pain I feel is in my knees. First the left (a torn meniscus would do that) and then the right, which numerous MRIs and cortisone shots have failed to diagnose/cure even as I sit here today.

I next feel the pain in my right shoulder, courtesy of a torn labrum that requires surgery. But since my playing days are over, doctors have advised me that the pain and rehabilitation of the surgery might be worse than just living with the pain.

Finally I look at my hands. Numerous broken fingers, and a surgically repaired right thumb.

Injuries are a part of football. The problem is, the culture of football demands that players never admit to being injured for fear of losing their spot. The game demands that you play through pain. That torn left meniscus? Happened right before halftime during my homecoming game my senior year in high school. The backup quarterback took my spot for a series of plays before halftime, and even though I could barely walk and could not put any weight on my left leg, I told the coaches that I was okay. When the doctor examined me, I lied. Every test he gave my knee caused me pain, but I didn't flinch and told him I was "good to go."

Why? I didn't want to lose my spot.

That surgically repaired thumb? Happened the opening game of my junior year in college. Our starting quarterback was hurt, I was in the game, and I was playing well. I was scrambling towards the goal line and dove forward with the ball in my right hand as the opposing team's free safety (curiously enough, that backup quarterback on my high school team) dove at my legs to tackle me. The ball landed on the one foot line, and landed first with all of my momentum and body weight on it. My thumb couldn't handle the force, and popped out of place, tearing ligaments in the process. For the next two seasons, I lived with a thumb that would pop in and out of place, rather than tell anyone about it. I dealt with it the next week, which was the one game I started in college, without telling anyone. Why? I didn't want to lose the chance to start that one game. Now, I cannot blame the two interceptions I threw in that game, which forced me to the bench, on a dislocating thumb, but I am sure it did not help. And what does it tell you about the culture of the game that rather than turn to the third string quarterback, our coaching staff inserted the injured starting quarterback who had one good ankle?

I think about this now as I read the news here in the city where I live, Washington D.C., as fans of the Washington Redskins are in fear that their talented young quarterback, Robert Griffin III, may have been playing with an injured knee. That he may have been playing with an injured knee that worsened while he was trying to play, and now may face serious surgery, rehabilitation time, and perhaps even face worse. The coaches claim that the player told them he was "hurt," not "injured." The distinction was in the 1993 movie "The Program," Omar Epps, a freshman running back at a fictional Division I football powerhouse, fumbles the ball after a big hit in preseason practice. James Caan, the coach, comes over to him and the following exchange occurs:

Caan: "Are you injured, or are you hurt?"
Epps: "What's the difference?"
Caan: "Well, if you're hurt you can play. If you're injured you can't."
Epps: "Well, I guess I'm just hurt then."

Why do players lie? Why do players, why did a smart young man like myself, lie to a doctor? The culture of football. Both on-the-field, and off. On the field, you don't want to lose your spot, you want your teammates to see you play through pain. But off the field, off the field is another story. Football is king in this country, in terms of sports. King. Professional football is no longer a seasonal sport, it is a year-round obsession. From the draft, through preseason workouts, up until the Super Bowl, professional football dominates our culture. But it is like this at every level of the sport. Even at the high school level, even at lower levels, teams, players and programs are given preferential treatment. Star players are treated like gods. I signed my first autograph when I was in Pop Warner. I was 11, our team was playing for a state title and a chance to go to the national championships, and I was signing autographs. In high school, star players were allowed to get a way with things that were criminal. Nothing to the extent of what is coming out of Steubenville, Ohio currently, but thefts and the like were known about and swept under the rug.

As for me? My high school girlfriend and I both applied to Wesleyan University. She had a higher GPA, a higher class rank, and higher SAT scores than I did. They recruited me to play football. Only one of us was accepted. My acceptance package came with a cute little football sticker on the front. Wesleyan plays in the New England Small School Athletic Conference. It is one of the top liberal arts Universities in the nation. There are no scholarships. But there is preferential selection during the admissions process. I should know.

So why do you think players play through pain, lie to doctors, and hide injuries? The fall from football god to last week's news is a hard one. And a fall that some fear would befall them should they admit to an injury. It's said that a player should never lose their job to an injury, but tell that to Alex Smith of the San Francisco 49ers. Came out of a game due to a concussion, was replaced, and now lingers on the bench. In the wake of his injury, some former players now in the media surmised that he should have not let the coaches know about the blurred vision he was experiencing. That same article talks about Greg McElroy, who hid a concussion from his coaches after the first start of his NFL career. It may have been his last.

Football is a wonderful game. I have so many memories of playing this game that I cherish. I miss playing the game. That first chilly fall afternoon brings back countless Fridays under the lights, or Saturday afternoons playing in front of thousands. But if that day comes that my son asks me if he can play, I do not know what I will say.

I also don't know the answer to this question: If I told that doctor the truth about my knee in high school, would I have lost my starting spot? Maybe. If so, do I get into Wesleyan? Probably not. Without Wesleyan, is there law school in my future? Probably not.

I met my wife in law school.

 Think I'm glad I lied to that doctor in high school?

Uproar Over Obama's Comments Re: Israel

The right wing is in complete furor/meltdown mode over the President's remarks regarding Israel. Former Governor Romney declared that the President "threw Israel under the bus." Representative Bachmann is actually raising money off of the President's "betrayal" of Israel.

Which makes me wonder if anyone has actually read, or even listened to, the speech. Considering that in one of his familiar bright red linked headlines, Drudge links to an AP story that contains the following: Obama's stance on the 1967 borders was not a major policy change, since the U.S — along with the international community and even past Israeli governments — previously had agreed to building on the 1967 lines.

I mean really.

Let Obama be Obama

Someone tweeted that shortly after the President's speech on long term fiscal responsibility.

I agree. And it is about damn time.

Obama's Long Game

I'll admit, I am as guilty of this from time to time as most of my friends on the left are.

In the aftermath of the compromise over the FY 2011 budget, many on the left, from Rachel Maddow to Ezra Klein to Christopher Hayes were excoriating President Obama for his "failures at negotiation" or his "give away to the GOP" or his "cave in." I read opinions from respected friends on Twitter accusing the President of a complete failure at negotiation, and worse.

I took these with a grain of salt, as we had yet to hear full details. I also understood the situation the President was in. The GOP after the midterm elections asked for a $100B cut in spending for the yet to be passed FY 2011 budget. The new GOP House of Representatives passed a bill approving $61B in cuts. While it is true that Speaker Boehner initially asked for $31B, this is not like haggling over the price of a new car, like I have seen some compare it to on Twitter. (Okay, maybe it is like haggling over a new car. But to complete the analogy, the salesman said he could sell the car for $10K. The buyer wanted to do it for $8K. But then the salesman learns that not only does his boss want to sell it for $15K, but the home office wants to sell the car for $18K. In that light, getting the car for $12K isn't a bad deal given that the home office was pushing for $18K).

What further clouds that analogy is the policy contained within the cuts, specifically what was cut, and what was not. Well, we're finally learning that and, well, let's just say that the President managed to do pretty well.

As a result of the legerdemain, Obama was able to reverse many of the cuts passed by House Republicans in February when the chamber passed a bill slashing this year's budget by more than $60 billion. In doing so, the White House protected favorites like the Head Start early learning program, while maintaining the maximum Pell grant of $5,550 and funding for Obama's "Race to the Top" initiative that provides grants to better-performing schools.

Obama also repelled Republican moves to cut $1 billion in grants for community health centers and $500 million from biomedical research at the National Institutes of Health, while blocking them from "zeroing out" the AmeriCorps national service program and subsidies for public broadcasting.

Instead, the cuts that actually will make it into law are far tamer, including cuts to earmarks, unspent census money, leftover federal construction funding, and $2.5 billion from the most recent renewal of highway programs that can't be spent because of restrictions set by other legislation. Another $3.5 billion comes from unused spending authority from a program providing health care to children of lower-income families.

About $10 billion of the cuts already have been enacted as the price for keeping the government open as negotiations progressed; lawmakers tipped their hand regarding another $10 billion or so when the House passed a spending bill last week that ran aground in the Senate.

While those on the left who initially criticized the President over this deal have moved on to the FY2012 budget and other criticisms of the President, let us remember that at times it does seem that while we are all playing checkers, the President is playing chess. And playing it rather well.

Obama: "No time for games."

President Obama just made a surprise appearance in the White House briefing room. In short, he indicated that the Democrats and the White House have now agreed to $73 Billion in budget cuts from the FY2011 budget, the number which Speaker Boehner originally proposed. The President indicated that the GOP now will not agree to the cuts because the White House cuts are different than the GOP cuts, despite the fact they add up to the same number.

Your turn, Mr. Speaker.

Shut it down

I used to be a fan of the Fox TV show "Hell's Kitchen," where London based chef Gordon Ramsay would put aspiring chefs through their paces during a series of challenges. Each week would culminate in the chefs opening up the "Hell's Kitchen Restaurant" to diners for a dinner service. Usually in the earlier weeks, each dinner service would end with an irate Ramsay instructing the staff to "shut it down," i.e., close the restaurant because everyone sucks.

It seems today Boehner is channeling his inner Gordon Ramsay, as we're closer to a government shutdown.

Again?

This just popped up on my Twitter feed:

@AlanFisher: Obama calls on Cote D'Ivoire's Gbagbo to quit "immediately"

Alan Fisher is a journalist with Al-Jazeera English, based out of London.

As Yogi Berra once said, "it's like deja vu all over again."